Reflection - Nathaniel Terrell

I’m damned if I do

but I’ll die if I don’t

I am such a magnet to

the things that hurt me the most

I sense she’s far away

as we lay so close

I keep scriptures in my head

I talk to God when I smoke

There’s no rest for the wicked

there’s no light in this cave

My thoughts attack my spirit

for my thoughts are depraved

What I know of love

got me stabbed in the heart

Holding everything together

was ripping me apart

To live is to suffer

peace is hard to maintain

Coalitions of Panthera-leo fear nothing

except fire or a cage

Hatred spreads like poverty grass

and division grows

Doubt has overwhelmed me

it has me by my throat

I can feel the heat rising

I am ready to explode

I’m damned if I do

but I’m dead if I don’t

Nathaniel Terrell resides in Western NY and he is a poet, author and spoken word artist. In 2014 he published a collection of poems titled, Here goes nothing (Mylk”n”honee publishing). His work has been in other publications including Cram journal, Writing raw, Fine line journal, Maudlin house, Rose red review, Good Men project, College underground radio.